For me, it comes down to what feels right. It’s simply a matter of keeping more positives around than negatives. I’ve been divorced. The two best things I did to get over it: Forgive & forget.
Let’s clarify “forgetting” a bit. If I’m reading Mr. Baldwin right, he’s not saying to completely erase them from your memory. He’s simply implying that devoting any of your energy towards what “could’ve, should’ve or would’ve” been, is simply a waste of your time. He’s right.
What makes you feel better inside? Holding grudges or forgiving? Putting energy towards what should’ve been or what can be? Trying to give blame or attempting to take some yourself?
My ex-wife and I don’t talk at all. We both agree that “forgetting” is the best option. In our case, we were fortunate to not have had children or an extremely messy breakup. To be honest, I did learn a lot from my experience with her. Like most relationships, the majority of time we spent together was pleasant, decent and fun. Why choose to focus on the few ugly times? There was plenty of fault to go around.
I believe Mr. Baldwin’s larger point is that holding on to negativity simply brings more negativity into your life. You really do have the choice to make sure that you feel good inside. It’s easy to do that most of the time, when things are normal/going well. True success comes when you can overcome adversity…with positivity.
Read the Article at HuffingtonPost